The difference between eating to nourish your body and dieting

Photo by Juan José Valencia Antía on Unsplash

What are some of the differences between eating to nourish your body and "dieting"?

One thing that's important when considering this question is that, despite what diet culture would have us believe, food is more than just calories.

Food contains nutrients that provide the cells of our bodies with raw materials for building, communicating, moving, and healing. Food delivers instructions for our bodies about what genes to express, and what hormones and neurochemicals to release.

When we feed ourselves, we also feed the billions of microorganisms living in our guts, which in turn affect our health, mood, and behavior.

Food is also a form of self-expression—a reflection of our preferences, heritage, and identity!

So with that in mind, here are some key differences between consuming food to nourish your body and consuming food to manipulate your body ("dieting").

Nourishment mentality: What nutrients should I eat more of to allow my mind and body to function at their best? This is an abundance mindset.

Diet mentality: What foods can I eat less of in order to lose weight or stay thin? This is a scarcity mindset.

Nourishment mentality: Eating enough food to support your unique energy and life demands is necessary for health.

Diet mentality: When it comes to food, less is best, regardless of how that makes you feel.

Nourishment mentality: Health is about being able to do what you want to do in life, for a long time, and feel good doing it. Body size is important in-so-much that it supports this.

Diet mentality: Health and thinness are interchangeable. It's impossible for an overweight person on the BMI scale to be healthy.

Nourishment mentality: Certain foods help us feel mentally and physically our best. These are generally foods that come straight from the earth. No foods are inherently bad, but some foods are better for us more often.

Diet mentality: A food is "good" if it fits certain diet "rules." And those rules are predicated on achieving or maintaining weight loss and thinness.

Nourishment mentality: You are whole and worthy of love. Period. Your worth and goodness are not contingent upon your food choices, your body size, or your health.

Diet mentality: You are only whole and worthy of love when you live in a thin body.

Nourishment mentality: Sometimes the nourishing choice is a cheeseburger. Sometimes it's a quinoa salad with chicken and veggies.

Food choices are context-dependent and highly personal.  All-or-nothing, one-size-fits-all thinking has little utility.

Diet mentality: You're either "on the wagon" or "off the wagon." The rules are the rules, regardless of your situation, and if you don't comply, you simply lack willpower.

Nourishment mentality: The body is a great communicator.  It is appropriate to eat when you're hungry and stop when you feel satisfied. Eating to nourish is predicated on listening to and trusting your body.

Diet mentality: You can't trust your body—it's mind over matter.  Hunger is a sign you're "doing it right," and the longer you can sustain your hunger, the better.  (And don't worry, there are "tricks" to make it easier!). Dieting is predicated on denying your body's feelings.

Whether you are eating to nourish your body or are dieting has less to do with the food itself and more to do with your purpose in choosing it (or not choosing it) and your process while eating it.

In other words, it is less about WHAT you are eating, and more about WHY and HOW you are eating it!

Take, for example, the choice to eat a grilled chicken salad for lunch.  Is that dieting or eating for nourishment? It depends: why did you choose it?  And how are you eating it?

Nourishment mentality: I chose it because I want to feel my best today.  I want to be able to walk up the stairs with ease one day.

I want to support my brain health so I can contribute more fully at work this afternoon.

I know I CAN have anything I want and still be worthy of love and belonging.  And I am CHOOSING to eat a salad today.  I'll stop when I'm satisfied.

Diet mentality: I chose it because I want to be thin.  I want to look "good" in these [wedding, beach...] pictures.

I want to lose weight and then I'll look good enough for my dream job, my dream partner, my dream house...

I CAN'T have a sandwich because it's not allowed on [X] diet.  I HAVE to have 3 cups of spinach, 4oz chicken breast...

If eating for nourishment is so great, then does that make it "wrong" to want to be thinner or more muscular or otherwise change your body's appearance?

In short, no.  There is no point in judging our desires.  In a society that implicitly and explicitly favors certain bodies, this desire makes perfect sense.

In fact, if you're not doing harm to others, there is nothing wrong or shameful about wanting to do anything... whether it's look like Vin Diesel, climb Mount Everest, play the piano blindfolded, or wear purple socks.

But it IS useful to get CURIOUS about these desires.

One question you could ask yourself is, simply, why?  Why do you want to change your body?  What are willing to do to achieve this?  What deeper values do these choices reflect?

Nourishment mentality: I want to change my body because I want to feel more comfortable in my skin.  I'm not feeling at home here, and I think changing my body could help me feel more like myself.

There are things I can't do in this body right now that I want to do, like play soccer with my kids, enjoy a mountaintop view, or pick up my partner and spin them around!

Diet mentality: I don't know why I want to change my body.  I just feel like I "should." I want other people to accept me. 

I want to feel seen and loved.

Changing my body and making it "perfect" is the only real purpose I've known.  What else is there?

Nourishment mentality: I am willing to choose foods that support my long-term goals most of the time. But it's okay to choose foods purely for immediate gratification and pleasure sometimes too.

Diet mentality: I am willing to do anything to achieve my goal, even if that means never having a chocolate chip cookie again.

Nourishment mentality: I value physical and mental health, relationships, authenticity, adventure, and justice, and my actions reflect this balance.

Diet mentality: I value my aesthetic appearance over anything. This is the purpose of life.

How are YOU eating? What mindset is driving the feelings you have and the decisions you make around food?